The last time I wrote a blog was around 8 months ago…and it was a doozy. I had announced that I had come out as a bisexual on Facebook and was in a committed relationship with my girlfriend. I was both terrified and excited, and this particular combination fed the feeling that I could accomplish anything! I was going to take on the world, release a barrage of new programs, speak to the masses and make a huge impact on my clients’ lives!

Instead, I hit a seemingly impenetrable wall and began chasing the white rabbit (no, not the one from Jefferson Airplane, though that would have been WAY more fun.)

Every time I thought that I knew I was going to talk about and do, I fell deeper in the rabbit hole in my head.

On Being a Bum

Let me back up for a moment. I don’t want to give the illusion that I wasn’t having fun. I was! My amazing girlfriend and I were forging ahead in deepening our relationships, I was re-energizing my connection with my kids and enjoying long walks on the beach, drinking beer and being, well…being a bum.

It wasn’t my plan. What I mean is, I didn’t set out to stop blogging or creating courses. I didn’t plan on not speaking and keeping up my social media appearances. But, every single time I sat down to write or create…nothing would happen. Nada. Zilch. A big fucking nothing.

I thought, well, maybe I just need to force myself.

Fake it Until You Make It

Yeah, we’ve all heard the mantra. If you’re stuck, just fake it. Push yourself until you get to where you’re supposed to be. Just trudge through it.

However, when you’re in the business of being full of integrity with your clients, helping them to become the best they can be…that just doesn’t work very well.

And I felt lost. Me. I had written the book on being bold (The BOLD Factor), I had just done one of the boldest things I had ever done in my life (coming out on Facebook), and suddenly, I was completely fucking lost.

You see, what I hadn’t realized is that in expressing something so intimately about myself to the world, in losing the biggest secret that I had kept close to my chest…I felt naked, raw, vulnerable and I didn’t know how to interact with the world anymore.

I felt fearful, and figuratively, I lost my voice.

On Finding Your Voice

I read. A lot. I found myself scouring over Facebook posts, tumblr, magazines and I created a Flipboard account…I read, I watched videos, and I had deep, revealing conversations with my girlfriend. I was discovering who I was without my secret…who I was now in being completely raw and open with the world, with my clients and prospects.

I felt closer and closer to being ready to move forward and an unreasonable, mind-numbing fear gripped me. What the hell? Then it happened. A dear, wonderful friend reached out to me on Facebook to tell me that she was feeling fearful about moving forward in her business and felt drawn to talk with me about it.

She ended up helping me! LOL! The irony!

In the end, it was determined that I really needed to write and find my voice.

Uncovering Inner Brilliance

I sat and wrote and wrote and wrote and wrote…stream of consciousness writing. And what came out in that writing made my heart sing, set my mind on fire and sparked my soul! I watched as my mission statement appeared on the page followed by my vision statement. It felt incredible…words flowing without stop. No effort. No pain. Simply free flowing thought.

Discovery

I realized…I like to curse when I write. I don’t mean just a little bit. I curse a shit ton. Anyone who is close to me, knows that I curse. However, I’ve always kept that out of my business because it’s not “appropriate”. Well, fuck appropriate. This is me.

I’ve overcome obstacles in my life that would stop some people in their tracks. I made it through it all (childhood molestation, planned suicide, bipolar depression, borderline personality disorder, self-commitment to a psychiatric institution, two rapes, two abortions, drug and alcohol abuse and the premature birth of my first son) to accomplish things I was told I wouldn’t be able to do (produced and hosted a talk radio show, published 2 books, became a public speaker, got married, and raised 2 wonderful boys).

And now, I have the most amazing relationship with the most wonderful person I never thought I would meet. She challenges me, loves me, touches my soul and makes me look at myself and the world through rejuvenated eyes.

Things You Need to Consider

• I curse when it makes sense. It happens to make more sense every day that goes by.
• I’m gut level honest and won’t hold back when we’re in a one-on-one conversation. If I see that you’re not living up to your potential or making excuses, I will call you on it.
• I adore my girlfriend. OMG…I didn’t truly believe in or understand what a soulmate was until we met. Holy shit, it’s amazing!
• I have become more socially and politically aware of the decisions that are made by those that govern the U.S. At times, I  will vent my thoughts about the more misogynistic, anti-LGBT and racially motivated decisions. (I try to herd most of these rants to a page that my girlfriend and I have, but some things do slip through. Oops!)

If you have a problem with any of those, then I would suggest that you find someone else to help you. If you should decide to stay, which I hope you will, I will be forthright, candid, and will earnestly put my energy into creating the best programs possible to achieve the vision and mission of my company.

BOLD Breakthroughs Vision

For you to experience your life in a way that makes your soul come alive and inspire those who watch!

BOLD Breakthrough Mission

Inspire you to grab life by the balls by discovering the possible within – then watch your uniqueness unfold and create the BOLD, kick-ass results you deserve!

DAMN SKIPPY!