Sabotage
Say it a few times out loud…it doesn’t even sound like an English word.
And yet, if you’re reading this blog, sabotage is something you’re probably all too familiar with in your own life. So, how do I know? Because if you’ve undergone any kind of trauma, you have filled your life with self-protection mechanisms to help you to traverse the hurt and pain that comes with the journey. At some point, when your insides are healing, the self-protection mechanisms that once served so well become hindrances to your success.
They go from the role of “Protection” to “Self-Sabotage”.
sab·o·tage
n.
1. Destruction of property or obstruction of normal operations, as by civilians or enemy agents in time of war.
2. Treacherous action to defeat or hinder a cause or an endeavor; deliberate subversion.
tr.v. sab·o·taged, sab·o·tag·ing, sab·o·tag·es
To commit sabotage against.
I became increasingly aware of the self-sabotage in my own life in encountering my “final” obstacle to full recovery. My weight. I have been overweight since the age of 12 when I was molested. With the subsequent rapes, I became heavier and heavier. Being overweight, in fact, clinically obese, served me well for years as I needed to feel protected while I healed.
It’s now almost 30 years later. I’m extremely happily married, have two beautiful children, have my own business, a radio show, author of “I Am Bound and Determined” and I’m a national speaker. Yet, the self-protection mechanism that I put into place to keep me heavy have become so engrained that I had to seek help from another coach to help me to unveil what I am doing to myself.
Now, I’m putting healthy practices into place including eating healthy, exercising daily, massages twice per month (yeah, that’s cool!) and changing the tapes in my head about my appearance. And, oh yeah, did I mention? I’ve put a plan in place to run a marathon in 2013.
So, here’s the “thump” for today…
What is it that you’re hanging onto in your life, that used to serve you, that you now need to let go of?
Let go and be!
Powerful, Deidre. In Second Blooming for Women, since we use the gardening metaphor, we advise women to “pinch and prune” those destructive behaviors that are in our way.
Thanks, Betsy! BTW – I love your book and highly recommend it! I would love to have you on my new show at WCOM, 103.5FM in Carrboro. I’ll give you a call. 🙂
Oooh that’s great! To emphasize what you’re sniyag, sometimes we can invite women into our sandbox that begin to irritate us. But, then, we’ll play nice and don’t realize that they’re are also irritating the other people in our sandbox. We also need to remember that it’s okay to un-invite people from our sandbox. Thanks, O!
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